Saturday, December 26, 2015

Ode to 2015

2015 has been a heart filling year with SO much memories! For my husband - his business venture, snapping the endless litany of shady perpetrators, then a whole basket of being Appa! For me - a sorely missed baby-bump, five and a half dozen coloured glass bangles, catching up with bazillion good hearted souls, leaving my first team, being a first time mom, fitting into pre-pregnancy clothes, a (double) promotion, pen drives bountiful of photos, a dozen books read another dozen shelved, seven wedding celebrations, greases of baby lotion, tears, gooey good stuff and gooey belch stuffs, a Santa who bought me *these* chocolates for Christmas and then a little baby girl who is pointing teeny weeny fingers asking for a Panda-ish jar full of jellies <3

*This* my friends, is happiness :)

May 2016 be a beautiful beautiful year for all of us - an early wish :)

Saturday, December 19, 2015

Half eaten apples, half read books etc

This is the first time am reading Anne of Green Gables.. I so love it.. I so wanna finish it... But life reminds me about that half-devoured book lying someplace over the living room over and over again, night after night. And then add a 6 day working and 3 hour commute to the existing madness!

There is only one job on earth where everything keeps falling apart like a dream sequence from inception movie, you so pull along despite and you will NOT trade it for anything else.

Call it being mom

Sunday, December 13, 2015

The little undies story

Once upon a time - Saturday nights meant Act II popcorn with movies or a rare lucky Vodka large with orange juice. Today Saturday nights mean matching undies with T-shirts *meh*

Pillaya pethiya, school ku anupchiya, adhu fail aanalum first rank vangichu nu sonniya? Idhu thaan makkaley vazhkai :p

Friday, November 27, 2015

Battlefield - Chennai floods

It is beguiling, overwhelming when your friend is taking a vacation snorkelling in white beaches, but your morning showers are itself a big deal, you crave to steal some precious me-time, you wish too look decent enough and not like some tattered rag which the wife cum mum role has turned you into  - then you've got an intelligent champ at home who has learnt to say 'dowwwwn' at the end of ring-a-ring-a roses.... you watch the baby and daddy read 'This is not my baby' book together, its okay you know, I can live another day all tattered tarnished looking for seeing this :)

It is pain stabbing to wade in murky waters, when the intelligentsia and fools alike are in various countries bearing various flags non-saffron-green-and-while where you don't have to constantly crib abt puddles and floods and more puddles. Then you realise half your relatives are in ankle deep waters at their home, half your colleagues are reliant on a hundred different transports and you stardusted, is a 20 min bike ride off to a dry place called home. Starts from work by 3pm and reaches now to write a post on Facebook :p ain't u one lucky bee?

There are days when you want to ask that woman pretending to working from home to shut the fuck up cos you know wfh is cooking, caring for the children cats and dogs and your billability clause doesn't agree to pay your salary for those hours of household chores, albeit you call yourself working. Then you realize that woman never had a mil who would cook your favourite meals especially bajjis to go with the rain <3

Time I've realised my gratitude is running low... Thankful for this wonderful family, job, fishes, fish-food cans and colorful owls even!

I so wish

I so wish -
To see you, but what if those eyes are different?
I so wish -
To hear you, but what if the words are distant?
I so wish -
To hug you, but what if the warmth is gone?
I still so wish to take you and be endlessly reborn.

Thursday, November 19, 2015

Mummy's tea

*You know there is this ritual about having tea? My tea with my mother is more a ritual to me, a something that I wouldn't miss for anything on this earth and these are few 'tea tales' that I'd like to share with the virtual world*

Day 1
Me - where is mom?
Dad - mom has gone out
Me - cheri naan appo kelambren
Dad - *puzzled look*

Behind the scenes - cribs to my mum, un pombalapilla ni irundha thaan irukkuma etc etc etc.

Me - who makes tea for me? You or mummy?
Dad - *silent*

Day 2 or smth
Me - where is mum?
Bro - mum and dad went out
Me - cheri appo naan kelambren
Bro - hey iru, she has kept tea for you in the flask.
Me - indha tea kudikka than naan vandena??
Bro - *puzzled look*

Keke! Its not mother's day or my mother's birthday but why not tell her 'I love you' today and post this? :)

ps - translation : cheri naan appo kelambren - OK am leaving. indha tea kudikka than naan vandena?? - did I come for the tea or what?

Wednesday, November 18, 2015

Her diary - its not so new

Its not new, the feeling of emptiness infused with colourful memories that once were; its not new - that rush of happiness on seeing your letters, with half-eaten words, which can slimly pass for a telegram, its not new - the pangs of jealousy which gurgles when anyone gets to be happy with you. It's not new, that feeling of love and hatred and love back again...

Its not new, to yearn if you'd love me too..

Monday, November 16, 2015

Superwoman am i

Today I am super woman..

To have attended to your tears a million times Godspeed. To have fought aches - back, neck to heart; and continued to teach you "Twinkle Twinkle" with action so that I could rejoice every time you showed the Twinkling stars with your teeny tiny 9 month old fingers. When I quit papaya and pineapple like a weed-smoker with nervous palsy so that you could fill the room as a 6 month foetus. To have craved for food - with ugly calories but denied so that you could be a little superwoman. To have counted and written and rewritten all the words that you could comprehend or talk. To look at awe when you finish my "one, two.." with a three. To see you in the evenings saying 'Amma' in a singsong fashion.

Do heroes mean wearing capes, saving pretty lasses with prettier eye-lashes? I haven't done any of that but I feel like a super woman today my child.

Saturday, November 14, 2015

3-4ths of an year

Three months have flown by since he's grown 6 mths. Yes, she's grown three fourths of a year from half-year! At 6 months those incessant oon-oon asking for more food as she just ventured solids, to her jiggle when grandpa says 'ungungaa ungungaa', to the love of lights when she forgets to pose for the camera at malls, and that excitement she shows while calling little children at malls, shops and clinics to play - she has grown a lot - a lot bigger, a lot less chubbier much to mummy's dismay and a whole lot curious - showcasing her growing intelligence!

At 7th it was a separation anxiety which the girl couldn't speak about as mum wasn't around to warm the little ones world. We grew from paruppu sadam, soups, apples and bananas to find out papaya was her most favourite! From sitting to crawling at a faster pace!

That lovely smile she gave me while singing our bath-song anticipating that sprinkle of water on her little feet just made my mornings - work days to be precise. I would eagerly await for evenings when I can rejoin my child, dig into her cheesecake cheeks and see that glint of mischief yet again in her eyes!

At 8th, the girl was okay with mom being gone. Though rushed into my arms every evening sparkling like a 100 shot brimming with happiness showing a one toothed smile (yes we sprouted a tooth!) Mum managed work, reading, rhymes, cooking and peekaboos in our play-tunnel!

At 9th we shook hands with a 'hi', said bye waving petite hands and hi and a 'thee' after one two! And how we jumped into anyone's arms that seemed to be going out of the house (or in my language going bye). We stood with and without support. How we still cried lungs out while dressing into tees, changing dipes or when charger remote and mobiles were taken off those little electricians hand! How revoltingly we had medicines that which we loved and asked more at 6 months. How we had favourite toys - white teddy, bheem monkey, froggie. How we transitioned from teething toys to bead balls. How we stacked rings in a ring stack however improper it may be! How we expressed our joy at A/c rooms and plush cars?

My my my, life is just a pearl string of wonderful memories. I just love every pearl that shone my daughters' first year..

It's surprising and disheartening all the same to know she's growing all up and too soon for me to catch up breaths with. This beautiful phase shall be gone too.. And she'll continue to surprise us with much newer wisdom she'd gained. Oh, the children and how they amuse us :) I would ask nothing more but the abundance of time to soak myself in her milestones and growing footpaths!

Friday, the thirteenth

There was a Friday, the thirteenth - it was scary, the first time we fought, that battle of words, when oblivion was lost and hurtfulness looped like a CD on repeat mode.

Today is a thirteenth of Friday too - silence has refilled the space of those words with a numb tongue, incoherent thoughts and a feeble hollow heart - no hurtfulness to wipe off, a half fought leeward battle, nothing left to fight for..

Which seems more scarier?

Wednesday, November 11, 2015

Thought for the day - Diwali

I thought of you as I made the sweets, I thought of you as sweetness hit the roof of my mouth, I thought of you when I lasciviously yearned for more - I kept thinking of you into the night my dear weighing-machine! :p

You truly weigh me down.

Wednesday, October 21, 2015

Celestial love bodies

Her thoughts raced, she swiftly thought of a zillion things and etched endless pages in her diary. 'Your mind is rocketing like a meteor.. So quick.. So very quick', he offered - attempting to compliment her. 'Comet, not a meteor', she corrected him, 'I would only die out from orbiting you'

Monday, October 19, 2015

Signboards

You know these cute sign boards - the one that says 'spinster' with a cute pink crown when you take a girls-selfie.. That 'just married' on the rose-pinned car... Mushy 'do not disturb' at your honeymoon cottage.. 'Baby on board' peeping from the windshield when you're preggy and pumpkin.  When you're mum you just need a final one - 'everybody pls STFU'

Friday, October 16, 2015

Forget me not?

You know the people who suffered from amnesia? She envied them.. She suffered from anti-amnesia.. the inability to forget things.. the fragrances that enticed them, the stairwells they walked, the laughter they shared, the quiet possessiveness that gritted at the hearts like pumice against limestone.. the bifurcated roads they took at the end eventually.. then there was a whole new set of unforgettable things… the way their words pierced each other.. the way the importance was makeshift.. the way others were showered with care when she was let to decay like a log of wood by the river side which looked beautiful from the outside with moss mushrooms lovely colors - olive yellows deep-greens browns; so earthy and beautiful that no one realized it was rotting inside while putting up an appearance otherwise.. she wasn’t able to forget the way she missed the laughter… the warmth in that voice.. that playfulness in the words.. everything to the moon and back.. She wasn’t ready to forget things either..

She suffered from remembrance, as some suffered from forgetfulness.. 

Friday, October 9, 2015

The Open book

You were not an open book? Perhaps you were my diary - written with flaws tears and guileless smiles? Closed but cherished.

Tuesday, September 29, 2015

Bite

While she sleeps like an angel. My mind plays devil and wants to bite her chubby cheeks. My restraint is failing - To bite or not to bite, that is the question.

Friday, September 18, 2015

Hers?

She walked through the old rusty office building where once met. A flood of memory rushed through her...

It was bliss watching him walk through chaos like a quiet tune... freshness of spring in his face, coldness of winter in his heart and a flutter of autumn in his eyes. She drank in his quietness, until she came beside him, to remind he wasn't hers alone..

She pushed off the knives stabbing her heart and continued to think of him, yet again..

Wednesday, September 2, 2015

Why bother?

There are people who know you are sweet and then those who know you're fun, stubborn, rash, eruptive, forgiving, unforgiving, generous, rational, crazy, you-care, you-dont-care.. they are the ones to be bothered about. Sweet is shallow, people who have known bitter and like it, now that's deep.

Thursday, August 13, 2015

The disavowed love

She thought of him.. She thought of the various shades his eyes gleamed, reflecting her dupatta, as they met hers, myriad colours - especially white. His laughter, the child-like and cuteish one, that which made her wonder why she'd fallen in love with a boy. His quietness, and the times she wished he'd stopped for a breath.

Her mind raced through the fervency with which they fought, if fights were kisses they might have nipped each other a few times, seen a dozen hickeys or so.

She thought of him as she walked the rains.. sometimes as she bought a coffee at their favourite joint. Shirts at his favourite shops whispered his name - those pale blues yellows, checks, stripes everything under the sun - he looked ripping hot to her in everything, and in nothing. She thought of the hundred and twenty ways he kissed her without using his hands, and with.

She thought of everything but their future, as there was none. 

Saturday, August 8, 2015

Blessed art thou

I have a blessed life you know - the fairy tale types where u get to marry the guy you want - *that* guy who is not only intelligent, but handsome, flirtatious (with all women, grr) and who's got wry but acceptable humor, one who looks cool in all photos taken in all angles whereas u with caked one inch makeup cant look okay for a profile pic kooda, and then God gets kinder and even gives you *that* girl baby you wanted. As I am writing I am done celebrating my little ones half birthday thru the week - pics coming up. 6 months of awesome ups and downs.

But when has man a perfect life? I always had one or two reasons to hate someone down to the very marrow of my bone, just cos it feels right to hate, however harsh the word hate is. I am a freaking Cancarian - those that are intuitive, can assume fairly right and can be sentimental over a freaking assumption all the same which is another reason to support my seething anger as well.

I was slightly annoyed today, slightly that I might have thrown anyone who crossed my lane off the roof, so there. And I open my mailbox and I have one of the sweetest mail :) someone made my day with few nice words. No flattery, no unnecessary paints, just dil se types, right from the heart, point blank and it made all my anger vaporise into thin air :) I am still lucky in many ways.

Sometimes I blaspheme for God had let a few people in my life, other times like this I thank! They are the light leaves which makes you forget the storm. I hope my well wishes fares an incredulous journey in the new path they've taken. #blog #gratitude

Thursday, July 30, 2015

hateth thee

I hate

Barking dogs
Crinkling plastic bags
Coughing men
Dolby surround
Ringer mode
Doorbells
Cooker whistles
Clanking cutlery
Creaky latches
Banging doors
Shrilly women
Cuckoos to squirrels
Velcro to zippers

I just about hate anything that wakes my girl up, inclusive of you if you would. I love Pluto, I hope Earth and it's inhabitants understand.

Monday, July 6, 2015

As time flies

I saw these pictures of toddlers throwing tantrums and I went all - "God this is *so* cute!!"

I can't wait for bubba to grow up.. When I can actually play jigsaw puzzle, Lego, house with her; when she will actually understand the fairy tales i read out everyday, when she can sing 'wheels on the bus go round & round' with actions with me...

Also I am currently distressed that she is on her adorable way to 6 months. Time flies. I want to see my 2 mth baby again who was just learning her social smile, you know..

Btw my little woman, has the ability to throw all these tantrums! She cried yesterday cos I took the rattle from her hand cos it was sleep time; she cried her wits out cos my brother was about to get her from me when she was actually sleepy and wanted to be with Amma.. Her tears don't annoy me, it astonishes me... I am surprised at the communication clarity at 5mo.. I want that rattle, I won't go to mama. There are of course sleep deprived mommy days when u wanna lock yourself out in the attic and ask the whole world (except your child) to go die! Otherwise -  Aww. Aww. If there is something that's a blessing that would be a babygirl

This life u know is sickly sweet. #babygirl

Friday, July 3, 2015

Her little footsteps

Well not literally, but she is acing day by day at a thing or two, apparently fast for her age! We complete 5 months of being mom and child.

My little one now...

Looks at teacups and cries cos she knows fluids are there which are tasty, interesting, sugary and not bland like bm!

She reaches out for her rattle; actually yesterday she cried cos I took the rattle from her hand!

She watches fishes and birds endlessly with rapt attention.

She still hates being woken from sleep and cries to earths ends like an opera singer if woken for a diaper change! Hence now we MCD her in an AIO with hemp inserts to keep her going for 8 hours!

She still loves her prams

She is not fidgety with baby wearing.

She's pretty much my luck charm, she's made her dad change entirely and be super helpful... She's made my promotion dream into a reality.. :)

The nursery rhymes have increased from Baa baa black sheep to Old Mc Donald to which she gives the I know these rhymes reaction!

Daily reading has gone from Rapunzel to Pinocchio to farm animals and Picture books; if you see it as too much of reading, I see it as too much of teaching!

To celebrate the 5th month, we have MCDs coming from Bangalore and headbands from Delhi :p *scene*

She's been sleeping by herself - God bless the little angel with more sleep and the mom with more happiness!

Thursday, June 18, 2015

Home sweet home!

So, it's home sweet home again! My little Chinky made a ruckus on seeing my in-laws cos they were new faces it seems. She wanted to be in my, my mother's, my aunt or manojs hands.. Its super interesting to note that human beings start developing trust at a very young age! As little as 4 odd months! Daily 6 a.m. she wakes up and wakes the whole household - am damn sure Amma is gonna miss my lil bubba big time. Bitter sweet.. Leaving mom.. Being with manoj...  Gawd. This too shall pass!

Wednesday, June 10, 2015

Sleeping beauty!

She wants to sleep. All rubbing those grapey eyes. But she chooses to talk to her dad, then suddenly remembered she was wanting to sleep... with a little grump and a wiggle here and there, she wants to sleep right now. Ah not yet, she does all the konji stuff to Amma. Cuddling, swaying, rocking - when put in the cradle she wants to come out desperately. And goes a round of Rapunzel and Pinocchio tho she can't understand a word of what am saying... then again she wants to sleep! Lord and she's asleep now! *lol*

Friday, June 5, 2015

Can the mummy monster eat her up?

Then there is this tub of butterscotch ice creamy something, with two raisin like blobs and some wafery strutty things! You are so dying to bite into it you know. Dig deep into those butterscotchy creaminess but those raisiny eyes are still sleeping; you dare not wake her! So you walk around the cradle again adoring and craving for butterscotch bites for a few minutes more, until she's awake!

Thursday, May 21, 2015

On a roll

Today is - I've been SUCH a mom day..

Usually, the little lady has to be cradled to sleep, I read abt the disadvantages of cradling as in what if your little one suffocates? that very minute I decided to bring her to the bed. From fussy sleeps, to fake cries, today almost the whole day she's slept on my bed without issues!

Following the above paragraph, the little lady is also a light sleeper which makes her a tad fussy if she misses her sleep. Worries me to NO ENDS okay. So finally I learnt that baby wearing helps to cool this off, I was on a rave reading reviews abt all the ergonomic baby carriers Ergo, Anmol, Cookie; mei-tais Almitra to ring slings. More I read, more I fell in love with Anmol whose stocts were nil, being a homemade ergonomic carrier with babysafe colours, man I followed them up from May 8th till date and got my shipment of 'Aarav Noah', magentaish Anmol carrier! I have written to their manager abt how happy I am!

Cloth diapering, talking about environment and avoiding the diaper rash I pooled money in CDs (totally worth it), cute pretty lovely designs on Flipkart! And what cute names - Bumberry, Superbottoms :D lol today, I tracked down the wholesale supplier and found that Bumberry which is 900 a piece, is actually 400 *faints* man, thank goodness now I can save my penny, she's just a 3mo oldie! And the diaper range has a very cute name- 'peachie cutie' awwww <3 they have got loveyy colours, owls, ships, hello kittys! Can't wait to cover the little bottom in these :p

Its been AGES since cat fights, haggling and brawling, probably during school or college when I had to deal with a few b!tches and their snarls. Today I HAD to put my feet down and say THAT. IS. MINE. DOT. To some random person as I wanted that for my little one and there's no way am gonna part with it for bazillion reasons. Man, I am a tigress with a cub *facepalm*

And, the little woman rolled to tummy today!  Shmucks! this life is bloody awesome.

Saturday, May 9, 2015

Touched

She wanted to hold him..

Maybe trace his square shoulders where his sweat laden crumpled cotton shirt hung not-so-loosely. She wanted to feel her fingers run through his hair cropped so short that it screamed summer!

She wanted to button his shirt down until the second just about enough to see the wheatish him suffused with his man-ish build...

She wanted to stage her fingers in small of his back... Him, looking into her eyes, him pushing a stubborn strand away from her face, as they talked unimportant things in the quietest of the lakes, under the darkest skies, the night only adorned by a few colored neons perhaps?

She then exhausted her love; touching him in the crowded marketplace, amidst loud hawkers, fuming hookahs and dull lightbulbs, only using her eyes.

Tuesday, May 5, 2015

100 days of Motherhood

Three odd months as mom ;) and I should tell you I loved every bit of the highs and lows of it. It's amazing that my little caterpillar is growing to be a hundred-days!

Her arrival.
My little one was borne out of an emergency-c looks like she couldn't wait to see me! As I, pretty much, was. Through my 40th week I was paranoid, every three hours when there was no foetal movement, I panicked to the ends of earth. I remember going under the knife, longing for a girl child but praying one last time 'God, let it even be a male child, but let it be a healthy one' minutes later it was a girl - I slipped tears behind my overcovers and God,for once, was certainly great.

First month
The perfectionist aka me was fidgeting with things, right from nursing to grooming her! The first day I remember being in pain throughout the night, I was declared OK next morning though feeling numb at my legs but I also felt OK by the second and delved into a Reader's Digest, that which I haven't still finished reading, whilst my little daughter slept almost swaddled.

Then came the nalla naal crap and I was allowed to go home only on my fourth day. I almost cried to my mom, I wanted to go home, I was fed up of the hospital atmosphere, a needle that was stuck forever on your arm, nurses around the clock with their medicines to suppositories, their taken for granted attitude - waking up a sleeping patient and asking have you slept well. Man!

Feb 8th, I was home.

Then came visitors forever and my daughter was a light sleeper - people were loud and clamouring, waking her up in turn keeping me awake. I wasn't allowed upstairs which was much quieter. Irregular meals, more irregular sleep, grooming her, keeping me presentable, it was all difficult inspite of mom pitching in. It was nightmarish.

Ten days into her birth realisation struck me 'omg, idukku mudive illayo?' that I'd signed this contract for a lifetime, there were no weekends for the mom job.

Twenty days old and she knew I was 'mom' she used to look from the corner of her eyes, pleading me to take her into my arms! Then the contract seemed so worth it! The twenty first day was her dad's birthday which we celebrated with her picture-album, some prized possession!

30 days done and I was moved upstairs. I realised what 'bliss' meant. We went out for the first time, a temple.

Two months.
She was two movies old - Fast and furious and valliavan! She could recognise her dads voice as well. She would listen to me singing songs intently, the ones I used to play for her when she was warm in my womb. Everyday she learnt something new, a fan, a light, a squirrel squeaking from the guava tree which overlooked my room. She learnt to turn her shaky head away from her mama, avoiding his consistent kisses :D she loved looking at the street lights when taken in her stroller. Her sleep patterns changed, she cried bitterly still learning the hows to sleep - and the mother who was now an amateur at giving traditional baby-baths, started cooking, something that she loved!

Three months
The start of her third month was marked by her first book of Rhymes was presented by thatha paati hoping she would be a voracious reader, but she, was addictively glued to the TV *sigh*  She's learnt to talk longer sentences. Learnt to cry in five different pitches indicating discomfort, sleepiness, hunger, carry-me and go-to-hell! She is downright demanding, making me wonder how a child who knows no language yet can be so communicative!

She is also a trip old - Pondy. Her mother now a 'pro' at mothering ;p gathered enough guts to leave her daughter away for 5 hrs - a bottle of ebm and her favorite aunty around, voila!

Nearing a 100 days come 12th, its more oil baths, more tummy time, shameless baby shopping, taming tantrums, long wee hours of baby talk, hundredth pointless parental article read and the first Mother's day as mom.

Am so proud!

I am not asking God for anything more, am grateful for this life and that love...

Tuesday, April 28, 2015

Assumption

When you thought I was smart, I was trying to be indicative

When you thought I was clever, I was trying just to communicate

When you thought I was clingy, I was losing hard at evaluation.

When you thought I was angry, I was only concerned

When you thought you could assume, I was nothing but helpless

All Worthy

She cries for food, thirst, hunger and warmth; never wasting time and energy on the worthless.

She fights to get into my arms or her father's; never paying heed to unimportant people.

She's been the most vital source of comfort; never like anyone who can only be around for you intermittently

She's subtractive and non-manipulative; she's my unconditional love, even if not..

Saturday, April 25, 2015

When teacher becomes the taught...

Wake up with the sun, exercise for twenty mins, get the tummys' metabolism started early, don't overeat, smile at everyone - strangers included, it's OK to cry instead of keeping things to heart and broiling...

The things my daughter teaches me... Daily, despite futility... :D

Thursday, April 23, 2015

Stuck

Trying to write but all that streams is a lot of incoherent words..

Thank God for drafts, I am calling it a day...

Wednesday, April 15, 2015

A piece of mind

Minds that haven't been used need refreshers or a little dusting to help revival and seamless use.

A blog that hasn't been used needs a little spring cleaning as well. Probably, as its a piece of your mind? Just done with the layout and content cleaning. If this were Facebook I'd say 'feeling accomplished'.

Tuesday, April 14, 2015

Wishing you lost

I wish I'd never known you. I am so done with you and then I am not. Day & night, you stay by my side, doing more harm than good. Feeding more fire than you could. I sit back and wonder what u have done to me and the more it stares back at my face that you're absolutely not worth it.

You make me do things, acting like you are the caring one, I wish I really knew if u cared, ever; or was it another stunt the two-faced you can put up, tricking me into believing that being rude is being true.

My bad memory forgets that you position yourself before everything else; that your "I" pronounces loudly; that complying to others' wish means a joke to you. The battles I've fought were cos of you, letting you take precedence and letting you steer me through rough seas in a sinking boat.

I'll slowly but surely let you go, that will be the most painful parting you've seen, be warned.

I wish I'd never known you, my dearest ego.

Saturday, April 11, 2015

Throwback

There was this night before my marriage, I was excited anxious and happyyyy that I cudnt sleep! I was nervously squeezing mehendi motifs onto my sis Preethis' hand much to the annoyance of elders who wanted a well slept bride!

Today am *this* happy and sleepless again!

That Necessity

I need...

An audio book with 3d surround which makes me feel am in the same room as the characters.

A DSLR with upload to social network or online album or drive, facility so that  don't have to search my cable, take that laptop, connect to internet and EOD waste time.

I need a laptop that works on sim card, so that internet doesn't require turning on wi-fi modem and awaiting a green-flickery-light.

A re-upload button which will reuse my tax documents submitted last year like property deed etc and that I'll only have to upload new docs for the  current financial year.

I want all my bills - mobile, electric, dth to auto deduct from my bank account. Yeah, am truly tired of logging into multiple sites with multiple user ids,grr :@

I want a mobile app which will help me put lights on at 6pm from my comfortable fluffy sofa where am super curled in.. (probably put on extra few lights and all that when its velli kizhamai, sashti etc days when my mom insists...). Or even better a programmed app which does this 6pm job without my intervention.

I need a little red, no not red, pink indicator light which says 'low on fuel' when my little one is getting hungry :p so that I don't let the kutti-tummies' hunger cues go beyond

I want incy-wincy spider to eat all the mosquitoes on earth saving me from shutting windows.

I want my mobile to consistently say 'the person you are trying to reach is indefinitely unavailable' *blinks*

I want WhatsApp to fake last seens.

I need time to slip into a new blog, at least if not slip into pressed clothes.

I want my doggies hair to shed by summer like the trees in Autumn saving me a visit to *cho chweet parlour*

No, I am not lazy. I am low on time.

I need time.

I need life.

Hearing me, God?

Mommyhood

After becoming mom I've realised..

* stairwell is the place where people shout the most & loudest.. Cos my room is practically situated near there and apparently am putting my baby to sleep..

* 3pm is the courier boys favourite time to ring the bell. You got that right - it's almost Rhea's sleep time..

* When she wets the last napkin you realise the others are still drying on the clothesline

* All the mamas, mamis, why even chotus might give you a tip or two abt raising children

* After 9 hrs of intermittent crying your daughter can give u one small smile in her sleep (mommy says talking with God) and it makes u go all down your knees

*  You thought pink was over rated by the girls as their favourite color (mine was blue) ..but now it actually looks super cute on her that it becomes your favourite color too now :p

* You think of watching a movie and click on Play button.. Bubby thinks I am clicking on her "Play" button and starts to cry :D

* You don't know which day of the week you are in cos you have no colleagues to curse the Mondays or shout out TGIFs

* you suck at singing.. But two grapey eyes pay all the attention to your lousy songs sung

* you can thank god for creating AR Rahman. No matter how pathetic lingaa songs are, your daughter thinks - oru deivam thandha poove, porale ponnuthaye, ennavaley were composed well :p

* You will have a lot of people raising eyes cos you, the new-mom, has written  *eppudii.. Ippo pesunga da enna pathi kekkee*

* and finally that Mom is the toughest job on earth its not a 40 hr week job where we can satisfy ourselves with a second rating and move to a diff role. Hence I so thank my mommie girl for doing that for me without flinching all these many tumultuous years.

love you ma, happy women's day..